'I am filled with music...'

I think I should have no other mortal wants, if I could always have plenty of music. It seems to infuse strength into my
limbs and ideas into my brain. Life seems to go on without effort, when I am filled with music.

George Eliot

Last week we bought a piano. It is new, cost a pretty penny and demands a room of its own but I'm already convinced that it will be one of the best investments we'll ever make.

For the past couple of years the kids have been learning piano on a digital keyboard with weighted keys and although the grand piano samples on it were very good (and the kids loved all the effects and pre-recorded songs) I've been yearning for something a little more solid. I did consider upgrading to a digital piano, after all, they are cheaper and more compact with the added bonus that they never need tuning but the romantic in me just couldn't wrap her head around the fact that 'there's nothing inside'. I mean, really. Just take a look at the inside of a piano...

Extraordinary, yes?

To have music in your life is such a gift. Between the four of us we play a very eclectic repertoire, everything from 'London Bridge Is Falling Down' to Chopin's 'Nocturne in E flat' by way of Disney's 'A Whole New World' and the odd Tom Lehrer tune. It's been so long since I've learnt anything new so it was reassuring to know that my fingers still knew their way to Middle C and my brain still knew how to sight-read music so I've downloaded the sheet-music for The Violet Hours by The Civil Wars. Who knows I might even be able to casually sit down and play it here in January.

Desire paths...

 

Walking the kids into school this week in this glorious Spring weather I was reminded of this lovely piece on 'desire paths' by the gentle author over at Spitalfields Life. I'm sure you have a favourite desire path yourself where you walk off the beaten track even when a perfectly good footpath has been provided for you by your local council? For me there is something so very human about the way we choose to navigate around rules and regulations following our nose, always on the look for something unexpected (like that amazing tree in full bloom right in the middle of the small clearing above).  

Our school is not in the middle of the woods. It sits on a fairly busy highway and has a regular car-park and drop-off point out the front with two lolly-pop ladies to help you cross the road but we prefer to park down the side of the school and wend our way along this desire path (there is actually more than one). The light is different every day, we sometimes get wet feet from dew on the grass and at this time of year the smell from the pine needles and the nearby wattle is heady. If you're lucky you might catch a pair of Rainbow Lorikeets circling but most days it's more likely to be a family of magpies caroling in the trees. Why would you go any other way?

Perhaps you have a favourite 'desire path'?

The things we do for love...

 

So, I made it! For the first time in many years I felt the fear and did it anyway. And we're talking feel like you're going to die fear. Walking across the tarmac every single fibre of my being was shouting, 'run, run and don't look back'. As I walked up the stairs and into the plane I was shaking uncontrollably all over and my heart was beating so loudly that I literally could not hear myself think. Once on board I turned to the flight attendant and said, 'I don't think I can do this'. It was getting hard to breathe. I stood there for a little longer knowing that the rest of my family was already on board willing me to tough it out but respecting my need to do it on my own terms. Suddenly I had one of those 'life flashing before your eyes' moments where I realised that if I didn't take this flight it would be the beginning of a long string of other things I would never do in my life. Before I knew it my legs were moving independently of my body and was walking towards my seat. Other passengers were, of course, amazingly understanding, one older lady even offering to hold my hand across the aisle.

As the plane taxied out I shut my eyes and started to meditate something I was sure I wouldn't be able to do in such a heightened state of anxiety but I could and I did for most of the 2 hour trip. Coming back was better (the lure of home perhaps?) and I was only what I call 'normal person' nervous. I took my Rescue Remedy, listened to Respighi's The Pines Of Rome over and over again, the only classical music I had on my iPhone, and after some turbulence and circling (of course!) we finally touched down.

And look what I would have missed out on if I hadn't gone...

Sunset at Kurrawa Beach 

Meeting this little fella on our balcony...

Seeing my family having the time of their lives...

...and of course cheering Bella on as she competed in her first School Aerobics National Championships. That's what got me there and that's what made it all worthwhile. The things we do for love.

Taking Stock...

Inspired by Pip over at Meet Me At Mike's I'm taking stock.

Making: travel plans

Cooking: poached quinces

Drinking: Earl Grey tea

Reading: a million things at once including 'The Love Charm of Bombs' by Lara Feigel; 'Through the Window: Seventeen Essays and One Short Story' by Julian Barnes and 'Finn Family Moomintroll' by Tove Jansson.
Wanting: courage

Looking: out a cloudy skies

Playing: at being a filmmaker

Wasting: ?

Sewing: labels onto jester costumes

Wishing: I could fast forward myself three weeks hence

Enjoying: learning how to edit audio-visuals

Waiting: for my quinces to be ready

Liking: my early morning mindfulness meditation

Wondering: what the future will bring (not very mindful I know)

Loving: Melbourne in winter

Hoping: I'm up to the challenge

Marvelling: at the production of 'Einstein On The Beach' I saw this week.

Needing: reassurance

Smelling: wonderfully aromatic poached quinces

Wearing: jeans

Following: BBC Twitter feed to see who the new Dr Who will be!

Noticing: small changes as I reach 30 days of meditation

Knowing: nothing is certain

Thinking: too much

Feeling: snug

Bookmarking: an online excerpt of Marisha Pessl's new book, 'Night Film'

Opening: the oven to watch my quinces changing colour

Giggling: I'm not much of a giggler

Feeling: fine

Hope you're feeling fine too!

(I wrote this on my phone using the Blogger app but couldn't work out how to insert links and not sure about formatting either!)

Meditation, music and museums...

clinamen, an acoustic installation by Celeste Boursier-Mougenot

School holidays are rapidly drawing to a close and usually, by this stage, I've secretly started to look forward to an orderly return to the school/work schedule. These holidays, however, have been different. I've been meditating every morning and there has been no holiday program for the kids just a mixture of work and days off for me and outings and days spent with friends for the kids. Time has had an elastic quality. Over the past two weeks we've managed to squeeze in visits to Luna Park, the National Gallery of Victoria and the Hollywood Costume exhibition at ACMI and I've watched in awe as colleagues raced to the finish line with the truly remarkable exhibition, The Extraordinary Shapes of Geoffrey Rush.

Another definite highlight was the wonderful day I spent in the city with Henry. I took him to Thomas', a very special fine music store in Melbourne, so he could spend a gift voucher his grandmother had given him. Henry's passion is classical music (especially early twentieth century French!) so of course the staff took a shine to him right away and we left with five CDs including one they gave him for free. He was in seventh heaven. To complete the top of Bourke Street tour I wanted to take him to Pellegrini's but, alas, it was too crowded so I got to try somewhere new too when we ended up at Self Preservation where we shared a delicious slice of Lemon Pound Cake with our coffee and blood orange juice. Of course we couldn't walk past The Paperback Bookshop or The Hill Of Content without some serious browsing and the acquisition of at least one book, Oliver Jeffers and Drew Daywalt's new children's title, The Day The Crayons Quit.

We then walked back to the car through the dappled sunshine of the Fitzroy Gardens, past Ola Cohn's intricately carved Fairy Tree and the model Tudor Village given to the City of Melbourne in appreciation of the food parcels sent to Britain during World War II. With time still on our hands we motored down to the National Gallery of Victoria where we sat before Celine Boursier-Mougenot's beautiful acoustic installation which chimed so nicely (both literally and figuratively) with my new meditation regime.

Time seemed so inconsequential that day. I could have sat there forever.

Winter Sunshine...

It's cold, cold, cold here at the moment. Winter Solstice is upon us, the mornings are dark and it's almost impossible to get the washing dry. These little biscuits are my attempt to inject a little sunshine into our light deprived lives.

Sunshine Biscuits

Ingredients
125 grams butter, softened
2 teaspoons of finely grated lemon zest
2/3 cup (110g) icing sugar, sifted
1/3 cup (55g) polenta
1 1/3 cups (200g) plain flour, sifted

Icing
1 cup icing sugar, sifted
juice of 1/2 lemon (add a few drops of water if necessary)

Method

1.  Preheat oven to 180C/ 375F and lined two trays with baking paper
2.  Cream butter, icing sugar and zest then stir in polenta and flour.
3.  Roll dough out between two sheets of baking paper until it measures about 1-2cm.
4.  Use cutter (or just roll into balls and flatten) and place each biscuit on tray.
5.  Bake for 10 -15 mins or until lightly golden and slightly firm to the touch.
6.  Leave to cool before icing.

The Simple Things...

Cabbage roses. What's not to love about a flower shaped like a vegetable?

Link Love...

 

Music Room designed by Duncan Grant and Vanessa Bell via The Library Time Machine

 

It's been a long time since I've indulged in some link love. Each week I see so many amazing things I'd like to share with you but somehow the time flies and the moment is lost. Not this week. Here are a few things that have been tickling my fancy over the pass little while.

:: 30 Abandoned Places That Look Truly Beautiful took my breath away (am I the only one who finds what has happened to Detroit incomprehensible?)

:: Dave Walker at The Library Time Machine continues to delight with stories drawn from the libraries of the Royal Borough of Kensington and Chelsea. I particularly enjoyed this one about 1930s interior design and his recent one which takes us inside the Imperial Institute in 1893. If you enjoy these two do take a look around the site. There are some fascinating stories lurking within.

:: How clever is Leeyong? Never have Explorer socks looked so good.

:: I am totally obsessed with Turkish writer Orhan Pamuk's monumental novel, 'The Museum of Innocence' and the whole wheels within wheels story behind it. Do you know the story? Nobel Prize winning author writes novel about a museum then spends prize winnings on replicating it in real life? Check out these gorgeous photographs of some of the exhibits The Museum of Innocence in Istanbul.

:: Finally, it's been great fun following Canadian astronaut Chris Hadfield on Twitter this year - amazing photographs and experiments - but nothing to top his version of David Bowie's, 'Space Oddity'. Take it away Chris...

I Am Anxiety

This week beyondblue released a new Get To Know Anxiety campaign to raise national awareness about the symptoms of anxiety, and to help sufferers get the help they need to manage it. Having lived with anxiety for over 20 years now this is a subject close to my heart. Although an estimated 2.44 million Australians reportedly experienced an anxiety condition last year, awareness surrounding its various manifestations remains low.

Genuine anxiety can not be dealt with by just 'sucking it up' or wishing and hoping that it will go away. It's not the result of an acute reaction to a very stressful situation (although sometimes it can start this way), it's a chronic condition that can have a massive impact on your quality of life. So if you or someone you know thinks they might be experiencing some of the warning signs don't wait to get help, the sooner the better. Yes, it's confronting having to admit that you are not coping with seemingly everyday situations but the sooner you learn the triggers and get some professional advice on how to manage your anxiety the better. I put in some hard yards when I was first diagnosed but I must say that since I've had children I've really let things slide and if I'm really honest with myself I've built my life around my (perceived) limitations. This campaign has been a wake up call for me. I let my last management plan slip past its use-by date but I rang my doctor today and I'm getting back on track. You can too.